


magic meets muggle

by softlikethesunset



Series: magic meets muggle [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Fred's alive, Multi, and fred's alive, and perciver y'all, because that's what actually happened. idk what y'all are saying, but he's not dead, crossposted on wattpad, dudley dursley gets redemption and a weasley sweater, i hate the title i just can't come up with any good ones, i made him alive because i felt sorry for the last two i wrote, i stg i love them so much, lmfao what epilogue, perciver is canon that's why percy was talking about broomstick regulations, the weasleys throw a christmas party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-29
Updated: 2020-10-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:41:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27269626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softlikethesunset/pseuds/softlikethesunset
Summary: dudley gets introduced to the weasleys.omg i almost forgot my disclaimer.disclaimer: jkr can go tf away. trans rights are human rights. these characters are mine, sorry jk, you can't have them.
Relationships: Arthur Weasley/Molly Weasley, Dudley Dursley/Original Female Character(s), Fleur Delacour/Bill Weasley, Harry Potter/Ginny Weasley, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Percy Weasley/Oliver Wood, charlie weasley/dragons
Series: magic meets muggle [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2006533
Comments: 12
Kudos: 121





	magic meets muggle

Dudley Dursley has been staring at the envelope for twenty minutes.

His girlfriend, Harper, was sitting in an armchair across from him.

“Just open it! I don’t see why it’s that big a deal.”

Dudley glanced at her, his face pale. “You don’t get it. It could explode any minute now.”

She rolled her eyes and picked it off the table, holding it out of Dudley’s reach. “I’ll open it.”

Dudley made a noise in his throat, protesting, but she began reading the letter. “Dear Dudley,”

Dudley put his face in his hands.

“I know we haven’t spoken in quite a long time, but my girlfriend’s family is throwing a Christmas party, and thought that you’d perhaps like to come.

There’s quite a lot of them. You’re welcome to bring your girlfriend, Harper I think her name is. Your mum told me about her in the one letter she sent me since the end of the war.”

“The war?” Harper asked.

“I don’t know.” Dudley said, confused. It had been three years since he saw Harry, and he didn’t hear anything about a war.

She kept reading. “If you would like to come, it’s next Saturday. We’ll send two people to your flat to pick you up, so just leave an address somewhere on the letter. You’ll notice that an owl delivered this, so please just send an answer back with the owl.”

Harper hummed. “An owl? That’s strange.”

“I know.” Dudley told her. “Most of them are.”

“Best wishes, Harry Potter.” She smiled. “He sounds nice.”

“Yeah, well-”

She cut him off. “Wait. There’s something on the bottom. How do you feel about redheads?”

Harper examined her own ginger hair. “Well, I don’t think they're too bad myself.”

Dudley frowned. “You actually want to go?”

She smiled. “Why not? Your cousin seems lovely, and I’m sure it will be fun. When have you ever been to a bad Christmas party?”

Dudley sat back in his chair. If Harper really wanted to go, he supposed he should, too. “Okay. But before we decide, there are some things I need to tell you.”

\---------------------------------------------------------

Two hours later, the owl was gone, and Harper was shocked.

“Magic? Your cousin is magic?”

“Yes.”

“And he is a wizard?”

“Mhm-hm.”

She was pacing the living room, her hands pressed to her face. “This is crazy. This is absolutely bonkers.”

“I know.”

Harper turned to him, a huge smile on her face. “I can’t wait to meet him!”

“What?” Dudley asked from his armchair. “I thought you would be nervous.”

“Why would I be nervous? This is so exciting. Does he have, like a wand and stuff? That spews glitter everytime he waves it?”

“Well, he has a wand, but I’m not entirely sure about the glitter part. One time, a stag came out the end.”

“That’s amazing. Do they fly on brooms like the witches in the books?”

“He had a broom, I think. Got it from one of his wizard friends.”

“Wow. Do they make potions? Like, in real cauldrons?”

“I’m pretty sure he had a cauldron, too. Not so sure he made any potions in his spare time, though.”

Harper rattled on and on, and all Dudley could do was answer her questions, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach.

\--------------------------------------------------------------

The Saturday of the party came, and an hour before their escorts were set to arrive, Dudley still wasn’t ready.

Harper was excited beyond her wits, rushing around the house trying to distract herself.

Dudley was still in his pyjamas.

Half an hour later, he still wasn’t ready.

Fifteen minutes and he was just combing his hair.

When a knock sounded on the door, twenty minutes late, he swung it open.

And came face to face with two identical ginger men.

“Hiya there! I’m Fred-”

“And I’m George.”

They looked awfully familiar.

“Y’alright there mate?” One said, George, he thought.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Say, you look quite familiar.”

“That he does, George.” Fred says.

George’s smile grew on his face. “Freddie, I think I know who this is!”

“You didn’t before?” Dudley asked, confused.

“No, not really.” Fred explained. “Ginny just handed us this sheet of paper and told us to bring back two Muggles, that’s you two, of course. Didn’t mention it’d be Harry’s cousin. Now, can we come in?”

“Come in? But, we’re leaving, aren’t we?” Harper furrowed her eyebrows.

“Of course. But, there’s no car out here.” George said, knocking his thumb back towards the street.

“The way we travel, no car is needed.” Fred said.

Harper and Dudley stepped back, letting the twins into the house.

“Okay Dudders..” Fred said, smirking before Dudley shoots him a glare.

Fred rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Just grab my arm.”

Harper took George’s, and the men raised their wands. “Now just hang on. We’ll be there in a second.”

And with a crack, they Apparated away.

\------------------------------------------------------------------

Fred and George appeared in the garden of the Burrow, two green-faced Muggles beside them.

“That was..” Dudley whispered, his face twisted. “Absolutely-”

“Amazing!” Harper cheered. “Is there anything you wizards can’t do?”

“Sadly, there are some limits.” George told her. “For example-”

“We can’t summon all the riches in the world.” Fred finished.

“Quite unfortunate, really.”

“Fred! George!” A Scottish voice yelled. Dudley and Harper looked around, confused, but the twins’ eyes shot straight to the sky.

A brunette man was hovering, perched on a broom.

“Who are ya friends down there?”

“Pleasure to see you too, Oliver.”

Oliver flew down to the ground, landing in front of Harper. “‘ello there. Name’s Oliver Wood, Keeper fo’ the Puddlemere United Quidditch Team.”

Harper giggled. “I’m Harper McIntyre. What’s Quidditch?”

Oliver feigned shock. “How could ya not know abou’ Quidditch?”

He walked away, towards a small broom shed, smiling. Harper followed. “Well, ya see, there’s this red ball, call it a Quaffle..”

Dudley’s eyes narrowed, and the twins turned to him.

Fred patted his shoulder. “Hey there, Dudley. Don’t worry about Oliver, really, he’s no threat.”

“He’s just quite uncommonly nice.” George added.

“And besides, he’s absolutely infatuated with-”

The front door of the house slammed open, and a redhead man with horn-rimmed glasses, dressed in a navy sweater and jeans, stormed out.

“Fred! George! Do try to keep it down! I’m supposed to be doing a report on screaming novels for the Minister!” He came to a stop in front of Dudley and the twins.

“Percy.” They both sighed, although fondness was clear in their voices.

Percy, as Dudley now knew him, clutched two rolls of parchment in his hand, his fingers stained with ink. “You’re late! You were supposed to be here twenty minutes ago! You had a very simple task, boys.”

“We know, Perce.” Fred told him.

“What could you have possibly been doing in Muggle London for TWENTY MINUTES?!” Percy is shouting now, his face red.

“Well, Percival, it was very simple.”

“Don’t call me Percival.”

“We may have charmed a car-”

“Or two-”

“Into wee rubber duckies?”

“RUBBER DUCKS?!” Percy squawked, his glasses fogging. “Mum has us on such a schedule- and you’re turning cars into rubber ducks? What kind of absolute tomfoolery is that?”

Dudley noticed that Harper and Oliver were walking back now, the latter broom-less, a fond smile on his face.

Percy kept ranting, his pale skin turning progressively more tomato-colored by the second.

Oliver crept up behind him, grinning.

Percy failed to notice, his knuckles turning white as he gripped the parchment. “Completely irresponsible..”

Oliver looped his arms around Percy’s shoulders, resting his head against the other's. “Good ta see ya fin’lly came out of your room, Perce.”

Percy jumped a little, his expression calming. “You’re awfully bad at sneaking around, Oli.”

Oliver huffed. “Am not.”

“Yes, you are, dear. I could hear you coming from fifteen feet away.” Percy scolded, although his eyes were shining.

“Okay, now that that absolutely disgusting love fest is over..” George announced loudly, rolling his eyes.

“It’s time for you to meet the rest of the family.” Fred said, smirking.

Harper came up to Dudley and looped her arm in his. “This place is wonderful! You wouldn’t believe how fun Quidditch sounds..”

The twins led the way, followed by Oliver and Percy, who seemed a lot less frustrated than he did two minutes prior. The parchment hung at his side.

Harper and Dudley hung back, and when the door opened, they were immediately greeted by a round woman with hair that matched the twins’.

“Fred, George, your father needs help in the kitchen. Oliver, wash your hands, they’re filthy. Percy, you too, that ink gets everywhere.”

She stopped when she saw Dudley and Harper. “And you must be Dudley and Harper, dears. I’m Molly Weasley, it’s lovely to meet you.Do come in, it’s rather cold outside.”

“Now, where is Harry?” She murmured as she handed them two hastily wrapped packages. “Sweaters, dears. I make them every Christmas.”

“Bill!” Someone yelled, and came barreling around the corner. “Bill, you absolute-”

Molly stopped them in their tracks. “Now, Charlie. What have I told you about running through the house?”

The man in question scratched the back of his neck, sheepish. “Don’t do it.”

His mother raised her eyebrows. “For how long?”

“Everyday since I was five.” Charlie, Dudley noted, had scars from burns up and down his arms. His hair, darker than his siblings’, was cropped short. “Yes, I know. But Bill stole my copy of the dragons’ feeding schedules-”

“Dragons?” Harper asked, and Charlie grinned.

“Oh, yes. I work with dragons in Romania, been doing it for years now. They’re quite lovely creatures.”

“Yes, Charlie we know.” Molly said exasperatedly. “And you don’t need that feeding schedule, not yet. It’s Christmas, for Merlin’s sake.”

“I know, Mum, but..”

She sighed. “Fine. But when you find your brother, tell him he’s a grown man who needs to stop playing tricks on people.”

Charlie smirked. “Tell that to Fred and George.”

He hugged his mother, kissing her on the cheek before running into the kitchen.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A moment later, the sound of pots hitting one other ricocheted through the house, followed by what Dudley assumed was the sound of Oliver Wood screaming.

Molly frowned, but didn’t make a move to go anywhere. Dudley was grateful. He thought he’d get lost if he was left alone in this house.

“Harry! Ron! Downstairs, please!” She yelled, coming to a stop at the foot of the stairs.

The stairs creaked as two gangly men came running down the stairs, nearly crashing into Molly.

One has red hair, freckles, and purplish scars going up and down his arms. Ron.

The other is his cousin.

Harry hasn’t lost his messy black hair, but his glasses are a lot less broken and his clothes fit.

He reaches out a tentative hand for Dudley to shake. “Hey, Dudley. It’s good to see you.”

Dudley shook. “Same to you.”

Ron was introducing himself to Harper, who was smiling so bright Dudley thought Ron should’ve been squinting.

“This place is absolutely amazing! I couldn’t believe it when I heard about dragons! And that self-knitting scarf by the door..”

Ron greeted Dudley, glaring at him before Harry elbowed him in the ribs.

“Come on, dears. Haven’t met the whole family yet.”

They all assembled in the living room, Fred and George sitting next to Dudley on the couch.

“Heya Dudley.”

“H-Hi.”

Dudley was 99% sure they were sitting there just to bother him.

“Well, George, don’t you think we should introduce him to everyone?”

“You guessed it, Fred.”

Everybody was clustered in little groups, whispering to each other.

Every once in a while a howl of laughter would come from where Harper was sitting, with a redhead girl and a woman who had shining-white blonde hair, like the moon.

“The ginger over there with your girlfriend is our sister, Ginny. She’s dating Harry. Man, you should’ve seen the look on Percy’s face when he found out, it was hilarious.” Fred told him.

George gestured to the other woman sitting with them. “That there is Fleur, Bill’s wife. She’s part Veela. Ron had quite a crush on her when she came to Hogwarts for the Triwizard Tournament. It’s all part of her Veela charm, I guess.”

“Bill’s next to Charlie, the guy with all the scars on his face. He’s a curse breaker for the wizard bank, Gringotts. He was a Prefect and Head boy at Hogwarts, just like Percy.”

“You’ve already met Charlie. Nothing much about him, just his dragons. Mum always harrasses him about never bringing someone home for the holidays. Sometimes I think he loves dragons more than us.” George joked.

Percy and Oliver are across the room, sitting with Ron, Harry and a bushy-haired woman who seems to be Ron’s girlfriend.

“Percy’s not much of a git as he seems to be, don’t worry. He works for the Ministry. Has for a while now. Oliver’s his fiance. He plays Keeper professionally, used to be our Captain back at Hogwarts. They’ve been together since their seventh year, when we won the Quidditch Cup.” Fred said with a laugh.

“Oliver marched straight into the common room and kissed Percy right on the lips. Gave us all quite a shock. We weren’t aware Percy was capable of loving something besides his homework.”

Percy must’ve heard them, because he frowned at his brothers. “Um, excuse me-”

Fred continued loudly, ignoring the glare Percy sent his way. “And of course, you know, Georgie and I. We’re the coolest out of all seven of us, don’t let Charlie tell you otherwise. Own a joke shop on Diagon Alley.”

Fred showed Dudley a photo of the twins in front of a bright orange building. George still had his ear, and they looked happier than ever.

“Next is Ronniekins. Harry’s his best mate, they’ve known each other since first year. Right dumbo sometimes, but we love him all the same. Him and Harry are training to become Aurors for the Ministry. The girl sitting next to him is Hermione, his girlfriend. They finally realized they loved each other in the middle of the war. Quite strange, actually.” George told him.

“Funny you should say that, George. I seem to remember something between you and Angelina..”

Dudley can’t control his laughter as George and Fred start chasing each other around the room, their mother lecturing them all the way.

Soon, it’s dinner, and Dudley ate one of the best meals he’d had in a while.

The twins cracked jokes the whole time, and Percy and Hermione had a very serious debate about one of the Ministry’s new policies or something.

Charlie told him that, last week, they had an equally deep conversation about which one of their boyfriends looked better in Quidditch robes.

Both Percy and Hermione flushed scarlet at this.

Arthur, the Weasley siblings’ dad, asked Dudley dozens of questions about the Muggle world.

Until Molly told him off, of course.

Harper was laughing the entire time, making eager conversation with Ginny and Fleur.

Harry didn’t talk much, but when he did, his smile was wider than any smile Dudley had seen before.

Dudley understood why these people made his cousin so happy.

As awful as his parents made wizards seem, this family seemed pretty great.

Needless to say, the next time he and Harper were invited to a Weasley family dinner, they accepted without hesitation.

**Author's Note:**

> yeah that was a trashfire but who cares.
> 
> thanks for reading!!
> 
> also i might
> 
> and i mean might
> 
> write a sequel because i just want more of dudley being confused about magic
> 
> and harper now i have a weird emotional attachment to her
> 
> so yeah be on the lookout for that
> 
> and my tmr snow white au hates me because i keep procrastinating by writing hp stuff
> 
> anyways perciver supremacy
> 
> happy halloween shuckfaces


End file.
